Week 7 - Shut up Siri, you're driving me friggen nuts.

Ok so the crux of this whole e-reader controversy, for me, is the quality of the voice reading back. While I understand that developers may be close to developing a crazy, lifelike computervoice, they're just not there yet. Have you heard what the Kindle Read Aloud sounds like? Personally, I can think of like 14 kinds of gross, bodily harm I'd rather inflict upon myself than listen to an entire book being read by that robo-voice. That's the biggest thing that's making the Writer's Guild look like a bunch of Dingdongs. Like, seriously. Let this one go, guys. People willing to subject themselves to listening to 10 hours of that should be committed--or will need to be once they've finished a book. Forget water-boarding. Just hook up a Kindle loaded with like Finnegans Wake or something to a loudspeaker, make it read aloud, and lock the bad guy in a room with it. By the time robo is done reading "bababadalgharaghtakamminarronnkonnbronntonnerronntuonnthunntrovarrhounawnskawntoohoohoordenenthurnuk!", you'll know where all of the weapons of mass destruction are. 

I'm guessing that if and when software developers are ready to debut their strikingly lifelike read aloud voice, it's going to come at a price. The current generation of e-readers' ability to read back text is pretty old news. I remember being in 5th grade in my middle school computer lab on those colorful, bulbous Macs that were so hot in the 90's, and getting an absolute kick out of hearing the computer voice read back "fart" and "penis" after I typed it in. Seriously. Hours of entertainment. I imagine that if I was able to do that back then, on a public school budget, nonetheless, it couldn't have been the most expensive technology. Fast-forward 15 years, and $200 can buy you a whole lot of hand-held--probably more capable than those bubble Macs--and I bet whoever makes them in Taiwan throws the read-back voice in for free.

New technology = more money. If and when IBM ever completes or releases that oh-so-human voice they've been developing for like probably 20 years, I bet you it won't come cheap. Some of the success of e-readers can be attributed to their fairly low cost. If you read a lot of books, buying a $200 tablet can just about pay for itself before long. Make those suckers a little more expensive, though, and readers may start crawling back to print as a more economical option. 

The Writer's Guild needs to concern themselves more with weathering the digital storm if they want to stay on top of things. Finding ways to adapt and innovate could prove more beneficial than acting like sore losers.Give it ten years, and some new technology will have come along that makes e-readers and read aloud seem positively prehistoric. The times, they are a changing, Writer's Guild. Get with it. For a bunch of probably pretty smart boys and girls, the Guild needs to stop acting like such dummies.